Jackie Chan, martial arts maestro, slips rock bottom when he starred in this unimaginative piece of entertainment aimed to charm the “Spy Kids” crowd, “The Spy Next Door”. Chan takes on the character of lead Bob Ho, a pen salesman by day turned international spy by night. His neighbor, single-mother Gillian (Amber Valletta) falls in love with the simple and trustworthy guy. However her three kids, teenager Farren (Madeline Carroll), nerdy Ian (Will Shadley), and 4-year-old Nora (Alina Foley) find the guy overly boring. Bob gets his chance to gain the kids’ attention when Gillian is forced to travel out of town to care for a sick parent leaving Bob in charge of the kids.

This event jumpstarts several mini-crises to occur attributed to Bob’s lack of experience in handling kids and managing a home full of three children. Things only start to take off between Bob and the kids when he reveals his professional and cool spy gear.

Complicating things even more, a Russian villain, Poldark (Magnus Scheving) releases a top-secret formula for bacteria-eating goop. By chance of fate, Ian manages to download the formula into his Ipod. With news flying fast, Russians immediately learn of this news and are now on the hunt for Bob and the kids.

The theme of the film offers an uncanny resemblance to the Vin Diesel’s 2005 comedy “The Pacifier” wherein an undercover agent is left to take care of a brood of five kids. This works for the film’s advantage especially the scenes where Bob attempts to form good relations with the kids particularly the young Nora. I’ve mostly enjoyed those scenes between Bob and the kids. They’re just too cute and irresistible and director Brian Levant is fairly aware of that. Levant’s previous record of family comedies have worked to his advantage for this film.

Unfortunately though the cute scenes between Bob and the kids are eye-candies, the film is pulled down by jokes and gags that fail to deliver and elicit more yawns and eye rolls than productive laughs.

Another downside to the film is the 55-year-old actor Jackie Chan himself. He fails miserably as a romantic lead for this film. This may be highly attributed to the huge age gap between his co-star Valletta whose 20 years his junior. Chan was unable to spark the much-needed chemistry with Valletta leading to a shaky start for the film which begins with the supposed love connection between the two.

Age had apparently taken its toll to the once glorious stunts Chan was able to deliver back in the days. Though he is still capable of performing them on his own, it’s obvious the actor is struggling to keep his foothold. Thanks to a great amount of editing, some may not even notice the change.

“The Spy Next Door” is capable of achieving a decent opening weekend thanks to little kids dying to see the film and devoted fans of Jackie Chan, however as soon as success begins would it fade again once viewers are met with disappointment.

The Spy Next Door